Often I think about going to my nephew’s sixth grade band concert. I tell you this because it was not good. It wasn’t supposed to be good. These children are just learning how to play complex machines while learning to read music and play along with other children learning to be musicians. Collaboration is difficult. When we don’t know what we’re doing, we can’t begin to comprehend what the other actors in a collaboration are doing or rely on them because we aren’t able to ask for assistance. I think my nephew learning to play his trumpet is an incredible example of a collaboration. The hundreds of years people developing the trumpet and music to play. Him, at home, learning to play through trial and error as my sister is tortured through it. His band instructor teaching lessons each week. The band instructor in this story is the Collaboration Coach. He is walking with each of the students so they can accomplish their individual and group goals.
People being polarized and not being able to collaborate is one of today’s largest obstacles to create positive social change. However, we see successful collaborations every day in our lives. How can we go to the grocery store, plan birthday parties, or host a holiday dinner successfully with all the diverse people we do this with, and not have the same ease when doing what our conscious minds consider collaboration? I believe we can.
When we learn lessons from how we successfully collaborate every day, we can be more impactful in our intentional collaborations. Collaboration has three repeated skills that help us as we work together. These are transformational leadership, conflict resolution, and facilitation skills. When we develop these skills, specifically for formal collaborations, then trust, space making, empowerment, team agency, and good communication are present… AND, with all of those working together, we are creating a better place for all of us to live and thrive. If we focus on individual collaborations and become better collaborators, we are changing the systems from the heart of everything we do and how we function as humans.
